'You want to be swept up in it all': Illuminating the erotic in BDSM

This research aims to understand the eroticism of consensual bondage, discipline, dominance & submission and sadism & masochism (BDSM). Eroticism is considered a central feature of most sexual experiences, yet there is limited research that examines erotic components of BDSM as lived by practitioners themselves. By adopting an experiential approach to the study using phenomenological psychology, the lived experiences of BDSM practitioners were foregrounded in order to clarify erotic meanings and extend existing understandings of consensual BDSM. Nine frequent practitioners of consensual BDSM were interviewed; discussing specific accounts of their BDSM experiences. Template analysis was utilised to analyse data, within an interpretive phenomenological framework. Findings illustrated that one of the most important erotic aspects was the co-collaboration between practitioners in order to create, maintain and engage with the erotic fantasy. The unpacking of the complexity of eroticised power exchange that occurred when BDSM practitioners adopted their sexual roles was also an important finding to emerge from the analysis

BDSM Disclosure and Stigma Management: Identifying Opportunities for Sex Education

While participation in the activities like bondage, domination, submission/sadism, masochism that fall under the umbrella term BDSM is widespread, stigma surrounding BDSM poses risks to practitioners who wish to disclose their interest. We examined risk factors involved with disclosure to posit how sex education might diffuse stigma and warn of risks. Semi-structured interviews asked 20 adults reporting an interest in BDSM about their disclosure experiences. Most respondents reported their BDSM interests starting before age 15, sometimes creating a phase of anxiety and shame in the absence of reassuring information. As adults, respondents often considered BDSM central to their sexuality, thus disclosure was integral to dating. Disclosure decisions in nondating situations were often complex considerations balancing desire for appropriateness with a desire for connection and honesty. Some respondents wondered whether their interests being found out would jeopardize their jobs. Experiences with stigma varied widely

Existential sex therapy

This paper considers what existential psychotherapy has to offer the ever-expanding field of sex therapy. First it considers the critical stance that existential psychotherapy takes towards diagnosis and categorisation, explaining why it is important for sex therapists to engage critically with notions of ‘sexual dysfunction’, and suggesting ways in which we might work with clients around the losses and gains of various labels. Following this, existential therapy is briefly outlined and applied to sexual issues, drawing particularly on the work of Peggy Kleinplatz and Irving Yalom, as well as the author’s own client work. Three aspects of existential therapy are explored in depth: The focus on client’s lived experience, the multiple meanings they may have around sex, and the importance of considering the various dimensions of existence. Throughout this latter half of the paper examples will be given where sex therapists worked with existential themes (including how to live a meaningful life, how to relate to others, mortality and the freedom to choose)