“I Don’t Want to Be the Bad Kind of Special”: The Lived Experiences of Autistic Youth in Extracurricular Programs in Their Communities

Abstract

Autistic youth face barriers to participation and belonging in community settings. Historically, autism research has privileged researcher perspectives and deficit-based frameworks, often excluding the authentic voices of autistic individuals, particularly young people. This qualitative, phenomenological study sought to address that gap by exploring the lived experiences of autistic youth (ages 13–18) participating in extracurricular community programs in Massachusetts. Framed by critical disability theory, critical autism studies, ecological systems theory, and intersectionality, the study examined how autistic youth experience inclusion, connection, and self-expression within programs designed largely for neurotypical participants. Seven autistic youths contributed to this research through participant-generated photographs and semi-structured interviews. Data were analyzed inductively using thematic analysis and the SHOWeD photovoice framework. The findings revealed five major themes: social dynamics and connection, impact of neurodiversity, self-perception and identity, resilience, and inclusive program design. Across these themes, participants described a complex interplay of belonging and exclusion. Positive experiences emerged when programs aligned with participants’ interests, incorporated sensory-friendly supports, and fostered relationships grounded in understanding and acceptance. Rigid expectations, lack of awareness, and stigma often resulted in isolation, masking, and self-doubt. Despite these challenges, the participants demonstrated notable resilience and self-advocacy, offering practical recommendations to enhance inclusivity, empathy, and flexibility in community programs. By centering autistic youths’ perspectives, this research challenges ableist assumptions embedded in traditional program design and highlights the transformative potential of neurodiversity-affirming practices. Findings underscore that meaningful inclusion extends beyond access; it requires creating environments that honor autistic ways of being, nurture belonging, and celebrate difference. Implications are discussed for community program development, clinical practice, policy reform, and future research aimed at dismantling systemic barriers and amplifying autistic voices