These are some journal entries that I was looking back on while we were sent home in quarantine. They began during the period of time when the coronavirus first seemed to effect my life. I believe they are able to show some of the ways God was working amidst the uncertainty

Studnicki, Brooke

English

Pillars at Taylor University

4/29/20 Brooke Studnicki  Some of my Journal Entries During COVID-19  Intro  This current pandemic has been one of the most difficult things I’ve had to go through. I’ve never felt so unsure of what tomorrow will bring. But this has been a reminder that I truly never know what tomorrow will bring, let alone the next minute of my life. It really has put things into perspective for me and given me the opportunity to place my trust in God more than ever before. I feel like it is often when times get the toughest that I truly allow myself to take a step back and realize the true importance of God and the insignificance of so many things that I often place on a pedestal in this life.   I had just come back from running at indoor track & field nationals and being on such a high when all of this came crashing down. I was interviewed for the echo and was quoted saying how excited my team was for our outdoor season and how it was a second chance for us to compete, days before the news came that there would not be an outdoor season. I remember being in my psychology class right before lunch when the news came that my season would be cancelled. I remember driving to lunch with a friend and seeing our other teammate calling his family on the phone. He had qualified for outdoor nationals for the first time his senior year and now that opportunity was taken from him. It was a day full of heartache. But this was also a time when I became so grateful for everything that I got to experience. My team and I got the opportunity to race at nationals before this all went down. That is a blessing. I attend a school and have teammates and friends there that makes saying goodbye so hard. That is a blessing. I now have so much time on my hands at my home in Waukesha, Wisconsin to form stronger relationships with my family and the Lord. That is a blessing. I have been taught by my coach, Quinn White, that there are two dogs inside of us: a positive dog and a negative dog. The one that will win, is the one we feed the most. So, during this time I am trying to see the good in all of this. I know there is so much good, because God is good and he will never fail.   March 11, 2020  Dear God,  I just wanted to say a prayer and also document here on the coronavirus. It’s insane that this is something I’ll be telling my kids about one day. It’s scary. It’s sad. There are a lot of fears and unknowns. I pray for those who are at risk, like mama and pap [my grandparents whom I live with]. Guide me to make the right choices of where to stay over spring break. Help protect us and give us healing if needed. I pray that your power overshadows this fear and uncertainty. We were reminded in chapel today that YOU ARE SOVEREIGN. Nothing of this world challenges your power. Help us to all know and be reminded of that. God I pray that we don’t have to leave and not come back. I pray for our track team. Keep us all healthy and I pray we can finish our season. HEAL OUR WORLD GOD. Use your might to HEAL. Work miracles with all the glory to you! … “You are Way maker, miracle worker, promise keeper Light in the darkness!  4/29/20 Brooke Studnicki  Even when I don't see it, You're working Even when I don't feel it, You're working  You never stop working” [From the song Way Maker by Leeland]. You’re always right here. By my side; leading me. You are all I need. I never want to forget that.  I never want to let You go.  You’re so good ALL THE TIME. No matter the circumstance!!!  March 12, 2020  God,  Wow. So much happened today. This whole coronavirus thing is going crazy. I was wondering what the purpose of this all was because I do believe there is a reason (or a billion little reasons). Today I found some of mine. One is that I need to trust in You. You are making all things work for good. Even though I may not know what tomorrow may bring, you do. So I need to put my hope and trust in you each day. Two is realizing how much I love it here and how thankful I am to be here [at Taylor]. I go to a school where we trust in you and know that you have authority over all. We can worship you together. I love my team. I have taken this all for granted. I didn’t realize how much I took Taylor for granted. I complained so much about my 8ams but I’ll take 8ams for the rest of my life to continue to be here. Third, and this is something I’m still wrestling with... but God you are so much more important than running. I can’t place my identity in running because things like this happen. This world is not reliable. I can’t place my life and identity in something that isn’t a solid foundation. It will only be taken away by the wind. You are who I should place my identity in. I shouldn’t look at myself and see a 2x All-American or a 2:15 runner… I should see a child of God. I pray over this world, God. There is so much fear and so many unknowns.   March 13, 2020  You overcame the cross, so you can overcome the coronavirus. It seems so big to us, but it’s so small to you in the scheme of things.  Hosanna “save, rescue, savior”  You are omnipotent & omniscient. This is the most I’ve ever had to place my full trust in you. It’s a good reminder that I really don’t know anything & I should rely on you fully, Lord. I pray that all over the globe God, people begin to place their trust in you. God I am just so reminded right now of how easily the things of this world can fade. This reminds me just how important it is to be so thankful for what I’m given here, but ultimately to place my identity and worth in you.  1 John 2:17 … I should be looking towards the future. There is greater hope ahead. I should live in light of the future I am sure of, which is your 2nd coming and one day being with you in heaven. 4/29/20 Brooke Studnicki   March 20, 2020  I am home now. Home for who knows how long. I pray for safety and good health. Keep us safe from this virus. Heal our land!  I found this verse: 2 Chronicles 7:13-14. Tell the world of this! Humble, pray, turn from sin. & God will heal our land! Let’s be faithful and trust in him!   April 23, 2020  It is often at my lowest points that I feel You the most.  Our world is so lost and broken, but realizing this makes me all the more excited to one day be praising our Lord and Savior in heaven. We are so unworthy, so lost, but He is in control. Omniscient. That is why we must put our trust in Him. If you’re looking for truth and certainty-a solid rock-during this confusing, heart-aching time… He is the answer. We are in this situation because of our sin and brokenness. We are merely human beings who have no way to know what tomorrow will bring. Only He knows & He is good through it all. He is sovereign.     Conclusion  As I look through my journal entries during this time so far, I see themes of deeper trust, greater thankfulness, and so much growth in such a short period of time.        

Some of my Journal Entries During COVID-19

https://pillars.taylor.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1026&context=pandemic-2020-writing

Some of my Journal Entries During COVID-19

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