Lynch, Kevin

English

Denison University

Prologue: A First-Year Writing JournalVolume 1 Article 112009Commentary on "When Maternity EncountersInnocence"Kevin LynchDenison UniversityFollow this and additional works at: http://digitalcommons.denison.edu/prologuePart of the Arts and Humanities CommonsThis Article is brought to you for free and open access by Denison Digital Commons. It has been accepted for inclusion in Prologue: A First-YearWriting Journal by an authorized editor of Denison Digital Commons.Recommended CitationLynch, Kevin (2009) "Commentary on "When Maternity Encounters Innocence"," Prologue: A First-Year Writing Journal: Vol. 1 ,Article 11.Available at: http://digitalcommons.denison.edu/prologue/vol1/iss1/11	   22	      Commentary by Kevin Lynch  ’11, English and Music     When I first read Lin Mu’s paper, what immediately struck me was the immense value he placed on every word and phrase in his paper. Rather than impartially choosing words to convey his meaning, Mu chooses words and phrases that mean something to him.  In the first paragraph, I realized that Mu was not just writing this paper because it was an assignment; he was writing it because he wanted to be invested in it. With phrases like “Nobody will deny what a warm breeze the picture [Campbell’s Chicken soup ad] blows toward its reader,” Mu does something many writers fail to do – he makes his words matter. One of the best examples of this idea comes later in his work. He writes, “Maternal instincts define most kids’ mothers as very emotional animals when they face issues or options about their honeys” (2). The unique thing in this sentence is in the last word. Mu uses “honeys” to describe a mother’s child. He could have easily chosen a word like “children” or “kids,” but “honeys” has a unique feel to it – it conjures an emotion in the reader who remembers back to his or her own childhood experience of sitting at the kitchen table waiting for mommy to set a bowl of Campbell’s Chicken soup on the table. And it is that feeling that the reader gets that is special, that make Mu’s choice of words so powerful.  But it is not just the words that make Lin’s paper so strong. How Mu attacks the assignment is unique as well. For Mu, the analysis of the advertisement does not stop on the surface. He discusses every angle, every minute detail in multiple ways, peeling back the layers and layers of messages that the advertisement is trying to get the reader to notice and feel. And with these two factors, Mu’s paper becomes an example of great word choice and an example of the deep level of explanation of detail that a writer needs when communicating with readers.        

Commentary on  When Maternity Encounters Innocence

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Commentary on When Maternity Encounters Innocence

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