In a recent issue of Word Ways, Harry Stern closed an otherwise wonderful article by impugning the value of computers in finding anagrams.  Since I have no talent for finding them by hand, and rely almost entirely on a program, I felt I should rise on behalf of the anagram-impaired--and to defend the honor of the anagram software

Morton, Mike

English

Digital Commons @ Butler University

26 ANAGRAMS BY COMPUTER MIKE MORTON Waipahu, Hawaii Introduction In a recent issue of Word Ways, Harry Stern closed an oTherwIse wonderful article by Impugning the va 1ue of computers in finding anagrams. Since I have no talent for finding them by hand, and rely almost entirely on a program, I felt I should rise on behalf of the anagram-impaired--and to defend the honor of the anagram software. Harry and I agreed on a modern version of "John the steam hammer" (although I do not expect him to taking John Henry t s side) . Ross chose two phrases, and I spent the summer of 1994 puzzling over reductio ad and 	the center cannot hold. I used my program Ars Magna, When you give It a name or phrase, ary and then marches inexorably which runs on the Henry vs. die while and Harry absurdum Macintosh. it consults an on-line dictlOn­through all the anagrams it can find. The process can bore one poring over the output have forced program which would allow you to work But, having only a simple program, beyond belief, and hours of me to think about a future more interactlvely. I read--or often skimmed-- a­bout 300,000 anagrams (the first phrase yielded 1,152,000, the second 193,000). My work consisted mostly of selecting the cream from this rather large crop. The program prints a gIven set of words only once, so I do rearrange the words within a given ana­gram. I also add punctuatlon and capitalization. On rare occasions I'll spot something by eye and re-run the program on a pa rticular subset of letters after subtracting the word I like. But 90 per cent of the anagrams here come from the program untouched by human hands, not counting shuffling and punctuation. InCidentally, I feel that Ross t s choices of phrases worked well for computer solution. Anything longer wou1d produce more output than one can peruse in reasonable time. Anything shorter would YIeld fewer anagrams. Harry and I have not shared our results, but I'll speculate on how ours will dIffer. The computer will generate a lot of medi­ocre anagrams for any phrase of reasonable length. Because it works strictly off a dictionary, words such as 'n' for and or it searches so exhaustively (if to slog through the output) the anagrams WhICh not only apply to it won I t use imaginative near­foolin' for fooling. But because a foolish human takes the time results may include wonderfu1 the subject but use good grammar. In my op (1) 	 RONA (it t (2) 	 AMY (Mon Reductio WebsteJ reductio an absur sion" (sc ter-gener. something The pI and. I but does leads to rum, and As I a number though I Armed Cuba But canrade Cuba dread: A couple to some F Bureau: fiCa A few cor Add tourisrr Cuba touris Before WE let you a Autos did It Cuba admire Cuba dread? Cuba rioter Cuba rum, a Cuba satire Perhaps we fInd incoheren Disann or c Aim, cut-~ Subdue ardc We also itself ca in some 1 In otherwise in finding hand, and e on behalf he anagram Henry vs. die while and Harry i absurdum Macintosh. ine diction­.nagrams it ld hours of 11 a future y. kimmed-- a­52,000, the ~ the cream iven set of given ana­e occasions 1 particular But 90 per 1touched by worked well more output orter would speculate lot of medi-Because it ative near­3ut because !S the time wonderful >od grammar. 27 In my opinion, two examples of wonderful are: (1) 	 RONALD WI LSON REAGAN I no, da rlin ,no ERA law (it took a human reader to turn era into ERA) (2) 	 AMY BETH SOLOMON I oh, so blame Monty! (Monty and Judy Solomon are the parents of this newborn) Reductio ad absurdum Webster's Ninth Collegiate (Digital Edition, of course) defines reductio ad absurdum as "disproof of a proposition by showing an absurdity to which it leads when carried to its logical conclu­sion" (some might argue that spending lots of time reading compu­ter-generated anagrams serves as a fine example of reducing something to the point of absurdity). The phrase presents considerable difficulties for a computer and, I suspect, for a human. It has no truly difficult letters, but does suffer from an abundance of Us (three of them). This leads to a lot of anagrams which discuss Cuba, bums, druids, rum, and so on. As I write this, Cuba figures prominently in the news. Quite a number of anagrams seem to refer to Cuban-American relations, though I can't say that these results clarify things. Armed Cuba did rout U.S. Cuba matured, or U.S. did Detour: U.S., Cuba, Madrid But canrade, a U.S. druid Cuba, U.S.: duet, dlin ardor Erratum: U.S. did do Cuba Cuba dread: U.S. mud riot Detour: U.S. did ann Cuba U.S. aid, dud: Cuba tremor A couple refer not to Cuba but its leader. The first may allude to some FBI obsesslOn with him. Bureau: "Castro? Olin dud" urn, buried Castro, a dud A few concern the state of the Cuban tourist industry. Add tourism? A curb due Cuba, add rude tourism Red Cuba: tourism a dud Cuba tourism? Read "dud" Dear Cuba, dud tourism Before we leave the Caribbean, here are some more to which 1'11 let you assign a meaning. Autos did murder Cuba Cuba: "Oust aIrOC'd druid" A sordid duet: rum, Cuba Cuba admired our dust Cuba: it's our armed dud Disann Cuba, outer dud Cuba dread? It's our mud Cuba adds truer odium Do audit Cuba murders Cuba rioters, a mud-dud Admit Cuba-ruse or dud? Druid dream: oust Cuba Cuba rum, a steroid dud Storied Cuba rum, a dud Duties: add Cuba rurror Cuba satire: dud or mud Cuba: "I used dud rrortar" I adored Cuba: rust, mud Perhaps equally relevant to the cutting edge of current events, we find the following series of anagrams which I think somewhat incoherently describe the saga of the Bobbitts. Disann or cut dud beau I'm cut; a subdued ardor But docudrama is rude! Alin, cut-subdued ardor Dumb cut, adieu ardors Rude docudrama; I bust Subdue ardor amid cut Cut, subdued amid roar We also hear a lot about drugs in the news today. While drugs itself can't crop up in the anagrams, the subject rears its head in some unusual ways. 28 Acid dream: drub out U.S. Of course, you can mus ica 1 notes. A duet: drab, dour music Add curious drumbeat Dread dour tuba music The preponderance scrubbing, and so Our addict abused rum Subdue a rumor, addict make music out of the phrase, leading to these Music abroad, true dud Music duet: add a burro A dour bard: music duet Order tuba music, a dud Dead curios: drum, tuba of Us also helps us with daubing mud, mud on. For the neatness-obsessed, or neatness-im­paired, the following turn up. The first anagram presumably refers to some new-age class in getting dirty. A course: daub dirt, mud Buried duds cut aroma Subdue dirt, cud, arana A tedium: scrub our Dad Crusade: "Out, rabid mud!" Out, bad air! Cursed mud! To rephrase Art Linkletter, kids say the absurdest things. A curious debut, Mr. Dad Curb a sour tedium, Dad A dumb cruise-tour, Dad Curious brute: mad Dad Bruise, cut our mad Dad Curious, drab, mute Dad But, Dad, I caused rumor Dad's a dumb couturier But, Dad, I'm our crusade Dictum: Dad, use a burro One last U-turn brings us to the word worked somewhat magically, 1 guess I fonowing make little sense. A druid abuts decorum Bad druid! Cause tumor! Abduct druid, or a muse Curse a druid: Toad! Bum! Abduct or amuse druid Daub a druid costumer Bringing up the rear, a random selection promising but which don't categorize neatly: Absurd odium, act rude Add curious, mute bard Adieu, umbra, odd crust Aid our sad, dumb truce Auditor cured bad sum Autism cure? Or bad dud? But add curious dream Cure autism, do rub Dad Cured dubious Mr. Data Curious debut: add RAM Cursed a dumb auditor Daub dried mucus--o, art? Did beat raucous drum Did crusade about rum Did mute raucous bard To finish up, I rank A dictum: "Subdue Discard dumb urea: "Out!" Drab odium? Cure: a stud Drab rut caused odium Dub tedious cur drama Dubious, crude Mr. Data Dumb auto crusader, I'd•• Dumb idea: dust our car I cursed our dumb data I doubt a mud crusader I rout dumb dud, Caesar I'd caused our dumb rat I'm a dud; cut used arbor Mad bard, curious duet Mad cur subdued a riot Mud buries a dud actor my top ten choices for ardor!" I crusade: "Out, drab mud!" Caesar: "Out, dumb druid!" Our dumb idea: custard Rub a toad (dried mucus) Ma, Dad: curb our duties Our idea: must curb Dad Sad: mud buried our cat Un, Dad bruised our cat Un, Dad scurried about druid. Since the druids shouldn't worry that the Druid mused about car Educator: druid's a bum Scare out a dumb druid of phrases which sound Odd crust imbued aura Odd tedium: scrub aura Odd•••a rub cured autism Rabid toad, rude mucus Radio scare but, um, dud Rub out dim dud, Caesar Said "Deduct our umbra" U.S. court dared aid bum? U.S. erotica": add mud~ rub U.S. abroad: rude dictum Un, but do discard urea Un, curb a dud asteroid Un, drab U.S. erotica--dud Un, erotica? Absurd dud absurdity: Bard: "Rut caused odium" Cur did dream about us Dumb U.S. idea: Tudor car Diadem, curds, our tuba Crude modus: I rub data The centel "Things apart, bt we can fi Col. 01 thing to elected, the polit North (al a hypothE Connect the He told Teh Nettled Nor 1 refrain Also in t people in Don't elect As 1 wri which bri Control ad: Pol Hics 1 Looking I especia ing loudl O1ant, chee O1ant ''Nee( O1ant "Old, O1ant "One-We can't offerings. suggests The concert Concert, at As usual begging A hot clem Cal Tech t; Can't hold Canton, t:h Catch Lono Catch Lono Catch lone Catch neon Clench too Cloth can' Cold, then addict ling to these d a burro ic, a dud mud, mud neatness-im­lably refers ud, arana Cursed mud! IS., our duties curb Dad d our cat d our cat ed about the druids ry that the out car d's a bun rrb druid which sound ed aura rub aura red autism de mucus t, UTI, dud d, Caesar ur unbra" ed aid bun? add mucf, rub ude dictun card urea asteroid erotica-dud bsurd dud ium" us )r car uba lata 29 The center cannot hold "Things fall apart the center cannot hold." Things may fall apart, but if we put the letters back together in the right order, we can find some meaning beyond this pessimistic couplet. Col. Oliver North's run for the U.S. Senate seems to have some­thing to do with things falling apart (before or after he gets elected, depending on where you stand), and it also relates to the political center not holding. The following anagrams trace, North (albelt somewhat erratically) from Iran-Contra days through a hypothetical win this fall. Connect the North deal He told Tehran, "ConnecNettled North on cache t" He can elect North--dOn't Do enchant, elect North Oh, elect North--can't end Elect North, Chant "Elect no hand, North!" Done! etc. 1 refrain from mentioning that Ollie North becomes 0, rot in hell! Also in the political arena, we see warnings against letting news­people into politics--and for electing Hawaiian entertainers. Don't elect anchor, then Elect trenchant Don Ho As I write this, health care looks like a big issue for the fall, which brings us to the following anagrams. Contro1 ache, then tend Don't con health-center Tend to health concern Politics has a lot to do with chanting and rallies and the like. Looking at phrases involving chanting, we find the following. I especially like the first, which suggests the importance of chant­ing loudly when you don I t quite know why you I re chanting. Chant, cheer, don't let on Olant "Cold here! No tent!" Ibn't let her chant once Chant "Need the control" Olant "Control the Eden" Ibn't relent--chant, echo Olant ''Old, hence rotten" Olant, then elect donor The nonce-ci1ant, retold Olant "One-tenth colder" Ibn't chant Creole, then We can't have rallies without music, and this leads us to these offerings. Does it stretch things too much to claim that the first suggests the Woodstock anniversary? The concert on the land Handel: Tenth Concerto Then once-latent chord Concert, and then hotel No, halt! End the concert! Then halt, end concerto As usual, I find myself with a miscellany of stragglers, each begging to have me make some sense of it. A hot clench, not tender Conan led the North, etc. Old thatch, recent neon Cal Tech trend: hot neon Ibn't cancel the throne On to the ardent clench! Can't hold ten-cent hero Drench once-hot talent Once the northland, etc. Canton, then? Cold there! Electron and the notch Rotten; hence can't hold Catch London ere tenth Enchant hot, enter cold Tenth concern: hot lead Catch lDndon three-ten Need tenth color, natch Tenth old ocean trench Catch lone rodent, then No, cancel the hot trend Then conceal hot trend Catch neon hotel trend No, no--drench the cattle! Then control the dance Clench tooth and enter Notch etched on antler Throne, cot, then candle Cloth can't end--not here Noted the concern, halt Trend to enchance cloth Cold, then hot entrance Old, hence rotten--natch! 

Anagram by Computer

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Anagram by Computer

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