This is the narrative of four women in academia spanning a ten-year relational journey. As a performance collaborative autoethnography, it explores and presents theories of subjectivity and transitional space. Through journals, emails, and dialogue we are trying on, being in, and becoming feminist poststructural thinkers/inquirers/teacher educators. In our work, we explore: How has theory changed our subjectivity, lived experiences and relationships, and moved us from comfortable spaces of knowing to uncomfortable places of becoming? In a series of poetry and performance narratives, we chart our own linked journey(s) in pursuing these questions. As autoethnographers, we grapple with meanings and moments of loss, desire, guilt, and love as a practice of hypomnemata. This study represents a reflective mining of such treasures, capturing moments of rereading and meditation, and a pause, even if an illusionary one, in our intellectual, spiritual, emotional, and embodied journey(s). Our work illustrates how the self looks in transitional space: in motion, contemporaneous, simultaneously in the making and in relation to others. We continue this practice as a pedagogy for being and living out the fictions of our lives
