Waldron, Maureen McCann

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Conversations on Jesuit Higher EducationVolume 47 The Spiritual Exercises as Foundation forJesuit Higher Education Article 18March 2015The Online Retreat: Ignatius Could Not HaveImagined, nor Did WeMaureen McCann WaldronFollow this and additional works at: http://epublications.marquette.edu/conversationsRecommended CitationWaldron, Maureen McCann (2015) "The Online Retreat: Ignatius Could Not Have Imagined, nor Did We," Conversations on JesuitHigher Education: Vol. 47, Article 18.Available at: http://epublications.marquette.edu/conversations/vol47/iss1/1828 ConversationsIn 1998, when the World Wide Web wasonly nine years old, CreightonUniversity’s Online Ministries was born.The ministry was started at a timewhen many people still considered theinternet a toy and few understood howit would change our reading, travel,shopping, learning, our prayer – andour lives. We certainly could not have predict-ed that our adaptation of the Spiritual Exercisesof St. Ignatius of Loyola would become aworldwide ministry available in nine lan-guages, audio files, and a book.The 450-year-old series of prayer experi-ences in the Spiritual Exercises came fromIgnatius’s own life struggles and his deepdesire to find out what God wanted for hislife. His keen understanding of human natureand his experience of having a personal rela-tionship with God – and discovering how to“speak to the Lord as you would a friend” –have changed the lives of countless people.But St. Ignatius could not have imagined hismuch-adapted Exercises on the internet, andneither did we. In the spring of 1998 we used the internetas an easy way to distribute scripture readingsto our colleagues making the annual six-weekLent retreat. We recruited people on campus tohelp us write a few paragraphs of reflectioneach day. We saw it as Creighton colleaguesministering to other colleagues on campus, andwe thought it was a nice Lent project.When we heard from a Maryland womanwho had heard about our website from apriest she met in Hong Kong, we began tosuspect the power of the internet was beyondThe Online RetreatIgnatius Could Not Have Imagined, nor Did WeBy Maureen McCann WaldronMaureen McCann has worked with Fr. AndyAlexander, S.J., in Creighton’s collaborativeministry office since 1997. In 1998, theyfounded the Online Ministries website. The Online Retreat is now available in ninelanguages.15304_mag_m  1/2/15  9:35 AM  Page 281Waldron: The Online Retreat: Ignatius Could Not Have Imagined, nor Did WePublished by e-Publications@Marquette, 2015Lwena, Angola. Women often lose limbs to unexploded land mines when attempting to planttheir gardens. Although the civil war ended yearsago, danger still exists because of the millions oflandmines left behind.Left: Omaha, Nebraska. Mother and child – 1983Photo credit: Don Doll, S.J. The photography ofCreighton’s Father Doll also helped stir retreatants’imagination.15304_mag_m  1/2/15  9:35 AM  Page 292Conversations on Jesuit Higher Education, Vol. 47, Iss. 1 [2015], Art. 18http://epublications.marquette.edu/conversations/vol47/iss1/1830 ConversationsCreighton’s campus and our imagining. We sensed that peo-ple wanted something more in their relationship with God. We knew from our own very busy lives that daily prayertimes were important, but not everyone was able to find thetime for it. It was Ignatius himself who first began adaptinghis Exercises from the full 30-day immersion in prayer. Wewondered whether we could possibly create a new adapta-tion of the Exercises. As spiritual directors, my colleague Fr. Andy Alexander,S.J., and I both knew that this long tradition had been hand-ed down generation after generation, person to person in thedirector/retreatant relationship, and we both understood thepower of that. Yet we heard from people who lacked accessto a director or retreat house. We spent the summer of 1998in prayer and discernment and decided humbly, if boldly,that Ignatius would approve of what we envisioned.Ignatius recommended 90 minutes of prayer each day forthose doing the Exercises in daily life, but we knew this woulddiscourage some people. Our idea was to offer five to ten min-utes of retreat material each week but not give the retreatant aset time to pray. Ignatius tells us to ask for the grace we wantto receive when we begin to pray. We suggested asking for thatgrace continually during each day: at the moment we awaken,while brushing teeth or showering, while walking across cam-pus to a meeting, while doing laundry or going to work. Guided by the Exercises, we outlined the retreat for 34weeks. We launched the retreat website in mid September,1998. We created a guide or overview of each week, alongwith a “Getting Started” page with points for prayer and a lit-tle more explanation for those who wanted that. We usedsimple language because the reader would not have anyoneto ask for clarification. Our colleague, Larry Gillick, S.J., added an encourage-ment column for each week of the retreat. Another Creighton colleague, renowned pho-tographer, Don Doll, S.J., generously offered34 photos from his vast archives to use foreach week of the retreat. We added a line ofscripture to each photo so people could praywith those. We realized that we could addanother dimension to the retreat by teachingpeople to set that photo as the background ontheir desktops each week – an ever-changing reminder ofthe grace to pray for that week.The early retreatants asked for printable versions andthen audio versions, which we added. They asked for andwe added guidelines for using the retreat in a group and sug-gestions if they were alone. (In 2009, Loyola Press publishedthe Online Retreat in a book, Retreat in the Real World.) We added a sharing link, where people could send intheir anonymous reflections on a particular retreat week.Over the years tens of thousands of sharings have beenadded. Those in the retreat often read the sharing week byweek and have the sense of a worldwide community allpraying this experience together.We wrote the retreat imagining someone making theretreat alone, without access to a spiritual director. How todeal with the sin of the first week without all of the person-al cues a director watches for? We wrote it carefully, withcautions about guilt and depression and tried to keep thefocus not on our sin but on God’s love for us; yet clearly wecould not delve as deeply into sin as if we were accompany-ing someone in person. We were surprised how many people took the retreat totheir own spiritual director or were led to it by a director.Parishes, small faith communities, spouses, groups gatheringin coffee shops, or brothers sharing a phone call made theretreat together.The Online Retreat is not for everyone. We found thatmany times people began the retreat but drifted away. Forsome, it did not feel like a “real” retreat if they were notasked to pray an hour a day. Others did not want to prayalone and needed an organized group. There was earlyresistance to “praying at a computer.” Some objected to ouradaptation of the Exercises saying it was not authentic, didnot use the proper language, did not require enough prayer,and did not continue the traditional relationship with a spir-itual director. In the ending weeks of the retreat, we asked retreatantsabout their experiences and were overwhelmed at theresponses. We heard from many who could not have madethe retreat any other way: a rancher 70 miles from town; adying woman in Scotland; a woman whose husband’s workhad taken them to Saudi Arabia, where Christian faith is pro-hibited; and a quadriplegic man who made the retreat at hiscomputer, using a pencil in his mouth. Retreatants rejoiced in their new relationship with God andin their ability to talk to Jesus heart-to-heart in the shower orgrocery store. One wrote movingly, “I returned to the Churchand joined the little prayer group there – tears of joy!!”An RCIA director used some of the material in her worksaying, “It enriched my reflections and let me be more spon-taneous in prayer experiences.”From a minister: “I was given the support of a lovingChrist to look at some difficult areas of life – and then withthe help of a wise confessor identify the resistances, the sin– and find reconciliation, forgiveness and freedom that Ihave not experienced before.”Another wrote: “The background for the week wasalways in my mind, and I thought of it often. I am growingwith each week. One of my biggest graces is the warmth Ifeel toward my relationship with God.”The Online Ministries website has grown to 9,000 pageswhich received nearly 25 million hits last year from 143countries. But beyond our deep love and belief in the powerof Ignatius’s Spiritual Exercises, we did not understand theimpact of our small website when we launched it in 1998.Our experience of a pastoral and loving God is one we havebeen humbled to share with others. ■15304_mag_m  1/2/15  9:35 AM  Page 303Waldron: The Online Retreat: Ignatius Could Not Have Imagined, nor Did WePublished by e-Publications@Marquette, 2015

The Online Retreat: Ignatius Could Not Have Imagined, nor Did We

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The Online Retreat: Ignatius Could Not Have Imagined, nor Did We

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