Reoccurring Altar

Abstract

As a former painter, when I developed an illness that weakened my body, I was able to find a new expression of myself using cyanotyping. Without using transparencies, I instead used my medical objects to print using cyanotype solutions I did not measure. My injection, swabs, napkins, cotton balls, and medications were used to print onto personal takeout napkins, canvas board, and canvas. I also used paintbrushes to paint on the solutions, bringing back my painter identity and gaining more control in the initial and final piece of the show. I had a total of 124 3x4-inch prints of just my injection, fading to more opaque formations within each row. For the pieces on taking an injection, I chose a triptych only using those supplies to reenact my physical motions done when taking my shot and the emotive feelings attached. The napkins it to resemble skin and have imagery of olive branches. The diptych is of a morning and night routine on transparent paper.When developing a chronic illness at my young age, my spirit was shaken. I fell into a depression as I could not use my hands, walk, or go through life like a healthy human or as an artist. When I discovered Cyanotyping, I had been at my lowest, and the beautiful Prussian blue that was developed from chemicals using the sun changed my perspective on what constitutes art. The stains put on canvas and paper would deepen if not rinsed, and you could see brush strokes left behind from the human hand that could not be changed. Within this discovery, I formed a new body of work in which I used the same medical tools and items I use for self-care to keep me functioning and healthy. Rumination and medical uncertainty can lead to magnifying anxieties. This body of work was an exploration of faith in medicine and how I connect using life-saving objects to create a sense of spirituality, necessity, and hope, while it also relies on consumerism and waste of plastic and materials. Through this process-based body of work, I focused more on routines and found that within chaos, the act of routine art-making can bring forth a new sense of religion in the self. Within this newfound sense of art making and loosening of rules set by my old self, who perfected portraits, I now find agency in the act of making and using materiality to find refuge in this chaotic world