On the (Im)possibility and Bliss of Telling My Dad, "I Love You"

While fathers seldom say "I love you" to their son(s), there is also acknowledgment that sons rarely say it to their father. Confessions of love are like notes in a melody of previous affirmations, so what is it like for a son to say it, especially if large parts of his life are spent in "connective avoidance" with his dad? Writing on the (im)possibility of eventually saying "I love you", just before he died, I offer a "blissfully poetic" account of the experience of saying it. I also reflect on the lingering significance it has had for my experience of loss and bereavement. Although this text offers no easy formula, it ends by showing what a text of bliss might eventually look like for a son in recovery. Addressing the questions, so what? And, now what, then? implications beyond the self are also considered.Sowohl Väter als auch Söhne sagen einander selten, dass sie sich lieben. Solche (Nicht-) Aussagen gründen in einer geteilten Geschichte, warum sollte also z.B. ein Sohn seinem Vater seine Liebe eingestehen, nachdem er sein ganzes Leben in einander verbundener Vermeidung verbracht hat. In diesem Beitrag schreibe über die (Un-) Möglichkeit, meinem Vater, bevor er starb, meine Liebe zu bekunden und zeige zugleich in poetischer Weise, welches Glück die Erfahrung bedeutet hat, sie schließlich doch noch auszudrücken. Obwohl ich kein einfaches Schema anbieten kann, ende ich mit einem Einblick in die Bedeutung dieses "Geständnisses" für mein eigenes Wohlbefinden. Zugleich biete ich Fragen und Lesarten an, die über mich selbst und meine eigene Involviertet hinausgehen

First my dad, then my iphone:An autoethnographic sketch of digital death

Potentially lousy singing and research poetry are used to make sense of losing - soon after he died - my iPhone containing video footage of my father singing. Since I did not back up this digital treasure, not only is he now physically dead, he is digitally dead (MONCUR, 2016) too. Considering how bereavement is shaped by digital death, in this article I focus on my experience of grief following this double loss. How is a lost video and the device that stored my memories impacting my encounter with loss? Haunting, and being haunted by, digital technology and the lost treasure, I write my way through this combined loss, showing what (im)mortality in a digital context brings me into contact with. I hope this writing connects with and encourages those struggling to persevere with similar technology-based hauntings.Es ist mir sehr schwer gefallen zu akzeptieren, dass ich - kurz nach seinem Tod - mein iPhone mit Videoaufzeichnungen meines singenden Vaters verloren habe. Da ich diesen digitalen Schatz nicht gesichert hatte, ist mein Vater nun nicht nur physikalisch, sondern auch digital tot (MONCUR 2016). Indem ich mir vergegenwärtige, wie der schmerzliche Verlust durch digitalen Tod gerahmt wurde, wende ich mich in diesem Artikel meiner Trauererfahrung nach diesem doppelten Verlusterleben zu. In welcher Weise beeinflusst das verlorene Video mit den aufgezeichneten Erinnerungen mein Erleben des Verlusts? Ich zeichne mein Ringen um die Bedeutung digitaler (Un-)Sterblichkeit nach und hoffe, andere zu ermutigen, die mit ähnlichen technologie-basierten Einschnitten zu kämpfen haben

The Neptune-Sized Circumbinary Planet Kepler-38B

We discuss the discovery and characterization of the circumbinary planet Kepler-38b. The stellar binary is single-lined, with a period of 18.8 days, and consists of a moderately evolved main-sequence star (M-A = 0.949+/-0.059 M-circle dot and R-A = 1.757+/-0.034 R-circle dot) paired with a low-mass star (M-B = 0.249+/-0.010 M-circle dot and R-B = 0.2724+/-0.0053 R-circle dot) in a mildly eccentric (e = 0.103) orbit. A total of eight transits due to a circumbinary planet crossing the primary star were identified in the Kepler light curve (using Kepler Quarters 1-11), from which a planetary period of 105.595+/-0.053 days can be established. A photometric dynamical model fit to the radial velocity curve and Kepler light curve yields a planetary radius of 4.35+/-0.11 R-circle plus, or equivalently 1.12+/-0.03 R-Nep. Since the planet is not sufficiently massive to observably alter the orbit of the binary from Keplerian motion, we can only place an upper limit on the mass of the planet of 122 M-circle dot(7.11 M-Nep or equivalently 0.384 M-Jup) at 95% confidence. This upper limit should decrease as more Kepler data become available.NASA, Science Mission DirectorateNASA NNX12AD23GNational Science Foundation AST-1109928, AST-0908642, AST-0645416, AST-1007992McDonald Observator

Shared genetic risk between eating disorder- and substance-use-related phenotypes:Evidence from genome-wide association studies

First published: 16 February 202

Genomic Relationships, Novel Loci, and Pleiotropic Mechanisms across Eight Psychiatric Disorders

Genetic influences on psychiatric disorders transcend diagnostic boundaries, suggesting substantial pleiotropy of contributing loci. However, the nature and mechanisms of these pleiotropic effects remain unclear. We performed analyses of 232,964 cases and 494,162 controls from genome-wide studies of anorexia nervosa, attention-deficit/hyper-activity disorder, autism spectrum disorder, bipolar disorder, major depression, obsessive-compulsive disorder, schizophrenia, and Tourette syndrome. Genetic correlation analyses revealed a meaningful structure within the eight disorders, identifying three groups of inter-related disorders. Meta-analysis across these eight disorders detected 109 loci associated with at least two psychiatric disorders, including 23 loci with pleiotropic effects on four or more disorders and 11 loci with antagonistic effects on multiple disorders. The pleiotropic loci are located within genes that show heightened expression in the brain throughout the lifespan, beginning prenatally in the second trimester, and play prominent roles in neurodevelopmental processes. These findings have important implications for psychiatric nosology, drug development, and risk prediction.Peer reviewe

Dissecting the Shared Genetic Architecture of Suicide Attempt, Psychiatric Disorders, and Known Risk Factors

Background Suicide is a leading cause of death worldwide, and nonfatal suicide attempts, which occur far more frequently, are a major source of disability and social and economic burden. Both have substantial genetic etiology, which is partially shared and partially distinct from that of related psychiatric disorders. Methods We conducted a genome-wide association study (GWAS) of 29,782 suicide attempt (SA) cases and 519,961 controls in the International Suicide Genetics Consortium (ISGC). The GWAS of SA was conditioned on psychiatric disorders using GWAS summary statistics via multitrait-based conditional and joint analysis, to remove genetic effects on SA mediated by psychiatric disorders. We investigated the shared and divergent genetic architectures of SA, psychiatric disorders, and other known risk factors. Results Two loci reached genome-wide significance for SA: the major histocompatibility complex and an intergenic locus on chromosome 7, the latter of which remained associated with SA after conditioning on psychiatric disorders and replicated in an independent cohort from the Million Veteran Program. This locus has been implicated in risk-taking behavior, smoking, and insomnia. SA showed strong genetic correlation with psychiatric disorders, particularly major depression, and also with smoking, pain, risk-taking behavior, sleep disturbances, lower educational attainment, reproductive traits, lower socioeconomic status, and poorer general health. After conditioning on psychiatric disorders, the genetic correlations between SA and psychiatric disorders decreased, whereas those with nonpsychiatric traits remained largely unchanged. Conclusions Our results identify a risk locus that contributes more strongly to SA than other phenotypes and suggest a shared underlying biology between SA and known risk factors that is not mediated by psychiatric disorders.Peer reviewe